South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
