so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
