what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I just gargled with NyQuil
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
