Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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