I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
So drunk its hurt
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Sext me about skeletons
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Randomize
