in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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