i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
Randomize
