Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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