Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
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