he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
