Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
