cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
