So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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