It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
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