I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
