I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Let's paint friendship bongs
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Randomize
