if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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