I smell stomach acid.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
She bit a glass in half.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Come on in and take your pants off
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