Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
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