with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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