It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Randomize
