the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize