who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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