I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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