why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
