Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize
