Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I don't think brook has ever known best
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Randomize
