I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
