I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
