Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize
