Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Fuck appropriateness.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
