Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
