i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
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