Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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