This girl is more easily done than said...
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Randomize
