wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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