everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I'm too high and old for this...
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize