he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Randomize
