my room smells like sperm. sweet.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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