Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
bring money and cleavage
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
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