other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
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