Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
