It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
