I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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