What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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