You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
i think my cat just said my name.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize