im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Randomize
