idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize