Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Randomize
