Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
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