tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Randomize
